I am HIS daughter.

I had a HORRIBLE delivery with Briar. My labor with Reef lasted 6 hours and my labor with Hawk lasted 5... With Briar... it lasted 16 hours. To make matters worse, by the time I was ready to push, my epidural had worn off from my waist up. I felt every tear, contraction, push.. it was awful. I had to be stitched from one end the other, internally and externally. As you could imagine, I had a pretty painful recovery. I was lucky enough to have my sister and mom here when I came home and then the week after that my mother in law came. They were my saving graces for sure! BUT after they left and my husband had to go back to work, I was alone.. You are probably thinking, "Wow.. it couldn't have been that bad.. dramatic much??" BUT for me, it really was. I had to learn to be a mom of three, with not much help (my husband works 10 hours a day, he leaves at noon and doesn't get home until about 10PM), while in pain, no sleep, and no car to get us out of the house (not like I would even attempt to do that on my own) to save us from insanity. I really felt like I was losing it. I would go into my room, lock the door and just cry. I remember one day in particular, I was having a difficult time breast feeding. It was especially painful on one side and I was feeling like I should stop nursing on that side all together. I just had such a problem with quitting. I didn't want to have to supplement. We are blessed with the ability to nurse for a reason, so how could I just give up and give my baby formula? I really started to feel like I was failing as a mother. I just broke down. I had lost it. I pleaded with my Father in Heaven to just help me heal quickly and to give me reassurance that I was a good mom and that I was doing the best I could. It was in that moment that I realized I NEED my Heavenly Father, I NEED my Savior. They are real, they live, and they are always there to help us in times of trial. I immediately felt this sense of peace and a calm washed over me. My sweet Reef came in and gave me a hug and said, "I love you Mommy! You are the best Mommy I ever had, don't be sad!" That is exactly what I needed to hear. My kids think I am the best mommy in the world, they love me, they adore me and think I am the greatest. I truly believe my Father in Heaven used my son as his way of letting me know that I am doing ok, that I am doing the best I can and my kids can see that. I am so incredibly grateful for my Father in Heaven.  I am his daughter, he cares about me, he is aware of my needs, insecurities, and my fears. He is there to strengthen me, uplift me, and comfort me.  I truly would be lost without him. I was scrolling through youtube and I came across this song. It brought tears to my eyes and gave me so much comfort. I felt this overwhelming need to share it with you all. I hope it touches you the way it did me.